OF HOW MUCH PAT MISSES YOU AND YOU ARE ALWAYS WITH HER
R IS FOR THE WAY YOU REASON WITH THINGS LIKE MOM THIS
T IS FOR YOUR A TENDER SPIRIT WHO IS WITH OUR LORD AND
SAVIOR ALWAYS WATCH OVER MY FRIEND YOUR MOM PAT
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY KNOW YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MISSED
Thank You Iris ^Stef's^ Mom
for this Poen and Gift
My Dear Friends
I Thank You
EACH and EVERYONE For All These Beautiful Gifts and For The Beautiful Kind Words You Sent For My Son Kurts 10th Angelversary In Heaven Page
Find Something To Live For
After the death of a child, I think it's important to find something to live for as we tend to feel so lost, especially in those early days. You know, we talk a lot about time, about how long it's been since we lost our child. I understand why, we changed so very much that day, we started a new life at that moment. One without our child so we measure time by how long it's been since they died.
We also talk about time in the sense of giving us time to heal. In this sense, I think we also have to do something with that time. Time helps to some degree by taking us further from that awful time but you have to find something to live for during that time. I don't mean that we are in danger of taking our lives. Some of us do, unfortunately, and I am sure that almost every one of us has thought about it at least a little bit.
I think for most of us though, we just lose our zest. Maybe we don't take care of ourselves the way we should. I know I had to be much more aware of how I was driving because I was easily lost in my thoughts. So, we have to find something to add meaning to our lives to help us endure. It's not just how long it's been, but what we've done with the time that is important.
And it's hard. At first, you don't want to go to bed because your mind will race as you lie there trying to sleep, taking you places you don't want to go. Then, you sleep…and dream and you pray it's not a nightmare but it will be. Finally you sleep, but then you have to wake up and face another day. What an awful cycle. It makes the days and nights seem unbearably long no matter how much we do or don't sleep. Because you never wake feeling rested, unless you have goals. Something to accomplish.
You have to find something to live for and that isn't easy. Find something or someone that makes you feel good or gives you that drive to keep going. Many of us memorialize our children by helping others. Fundraising for the illness that took our child's life. Taking up a cause in their name. Helping others that travel this lonesome road with us.
Grief is a journey. Don't travel aimlessly. Find something to live for and travel somewhere with purpose. I honor my son by trying to help others with this journey and becoming a kinder person. I love my son and miss him very much. In time, I have discovered that helping others, helps me. For now, that is my purpose, my something to live for.
Mike Willhoite~David's Father
Written on September 15, 2008
Thank You So Very Much Mike For Letting Me Use These Words Here,
Love, Pat~Kevin and Kurt's Mother
"Back In Heaven"
I Accomplished my job and back in Heaven
I arrived sometime shortly after eleven
We're told to bring them home on what day
Or Go Chase the devil and his people away
Depends on how bad was this persons sins
If God Lets the devil and his people win
I can say I'm coming but I can't say why
But that when sent down I will stop by
Your life good or bad never goes unseen
It gets replayed like on a movie screen
We all get to see everything we missed
All things even when we first got kissed
We think no one can see no one will know
But I'm here to tell you that just isn't so
Everything from your past we get to see
Even the day God send Kurt back for me
Do your best your life can't be remade
Here everyone gets to see it being replayed
Love You Mom, From Kevin & Kurt
JULY 9, 2008
You honor me by your request. Thank you.
The first thought I had was how to pay tribute or say something meaningful about someone I did not know, then I realized that I knew you fairly well and I just bet that, had I known Kurt, I would have seen a lot of his mother in him. Good Mom's raise good kids most of the time and I wish had known him. I was also thinking how you can tell how greatly someone was loved by how dearly they are missed. The same day as your request, I found this anonymous quote that says it better than I ever could.........
"Grief never ends
But it changes
It's a passage
Not a place to stay.
The sense of loss
Must give way
If we're to value
The life that was lived.
Grief is not a sign of weakness
Nor lack of faith,
It is the price of LOVE."
Your love for Kurt has helped so many others through the years and the message above describes how I see you. Take care of you, Mike Willhoite